You Can’t Please Everyone….So Stop Trying!

During a recent weekend getaway, I received a Twitter DM from a follower that stated, “Bye u ignore me so gone.” My first reaction was lthe same as most people, scratching my head and wondering why they felt like I had ignored them Since I was away for the weekend and taking an unsual break from Twitter, I decided to not respond until my rest and relaxation was over; and until I had time to think through my response to this person. In pondering how to respond, I decided to not respond at all. Why? Because if that person felt like I had ignored them, were my words going to change their mind? Probably not. At least in my opinion.

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We are all busy; in life, with our families and with our work. I am the first to admit that I miss things at times. We all do! When I am on Twitter, I am there for my own consulting business, talking with friends or working on the multiple client accounts I manage. So yes, I miss conversations at times. This never happens on purpose though! If I didn’t want to talk to you, I wouldn’t follow you. With over 20K followers I can’t personally speak with everyone, every day, but I try my best to respond to any mentions or Tweets that are directed towards me. I also tell my followers on a regular basis that if I have missed something, Tweet me again or DM me.

My question to this person is this: if you felt like I was ignoring you, why didn’t you Tweet me or DM me before sending the goodbye message? Everyone of my followers are important and has something to say, plus they all add value to my Twitter stream. But unfortunately if it is up to me to initiate the conversation with all 20k+ of them; well, that is not going to happen. Am I wrong to think like this? Yes, I have people that I typically talk with each day, but if someone sends me a note, I do my best to respond in a timely manner.

How do you handle when someone sends you a goodbye message like the one I received? To me, every person on this planet is important and valuable and I am truly sorry that this person felt ignored. I truly believe that we cannot please everyone and we should stop trying!

Those are just some of my thoughts; what are yours?

Comments

  1. <html><head></head><body style="word-wrap: break-word; -webkit-nbsp-mode: space; -webkit-line-break: after-white-space; ">EXACTLY! &nbsp; You make excellent points, Teddy. &nbsp;We co all we can, but we will never please everyone. And, its okay to let some go; because our time and sanity is better spent elsewhere.<div><br></div><div>Thank you for your comments!!</div><div><br></div><div><br><div><div></div></div></div></body></html>

  2. John,I love this post! People think people like you and I are often at there call. That is because we are connected all the time. I use an Iphone and a LTE rocket stick. I almost always have a laptop with me. That said I do moderate things.If I am out for dinner with friends they are my priority at the time. If I am with Kelli she is my priority. The point I am making is answering my social media requests is not always at the top of my list.This is just the reality. Like you I always try and engage with people. The key people including clients know how to get a hold of me in a hurry.I agree that everyone is important. Sometimes we just have other things on the go and in many of our cases we are always on the run.The point I am making is if I am doing something with people I want to spend time with the people I am with. Why should I Ignore them?

  3. John Lusher says:

    Thank you Rob, I appreciate your comments and feedback. We look at this in similar fashion; we may be online a lot, but that doesn’t mean that we are there 24×7 for others. Everyone is important, but that doesn’t mean I ignore others to make them feel important!I appreciate you my friend!

  4. John, My primary question with the DM you received would be to wonder about the attitude of the person sending it – do they interrupt people when they sleep or when they are going to work because he/she feels doing so is behaviour which casts them aside? I can’t begin to imagine being a person with that attitude toward life – it makes me wonder how they feel about themselves and if they’re a happy person. Given that the reason I am involved in Social Media is expressly to support others, this post is dead on for me. Fortunately, I’ve never received a message like the one you did but I do work very hard to ensure that people I’m following in need of support receive the support they need in a timely manner. The one thing I do emphasize is that I am human and there will be times when I’m not going to be around. I put a priority on self-care and instead of seeing this as selfish, my #ppdchat followers and others see this as walking the walk instead of just talking the talk. With the instant connectivity available through so many platforms these days, it’s easy to believe we have a "right" to unfettered and constant access to anyone involved in any form of Social Media. What we forget is that we have to live life too and Twitter/FB/Instagram/Blogging/Tumblr is not living life. When I’m with someone, I put my phone away unless there’s a crisis with a Mom and even then I manage it with the least amount of interruption possible. But if I have to make a call or get involved in DM’s or texts, the people I’m with are understanding. Thankfully, the community typically picks up the slack when I’m not around. No one is there for someone else 24×7 in real life – we have to sleep at some point and have other obligations. Such is the same with social media. The best moments in life are lived offline.

  5. John Lusher says:

    Great feedback Laura! I wonder the same thing about if they are truly a happy person in their own life; my guess is they are not.Indeed, we all try to provide the support needed and with what you do, it is extremely important to do so; but there has to be a point of turning it off.Very well said, we need time to ourselves, other obligations, relaxation time, sleep time; whatever time! I made the mistake in the past of answering cell phones and doing work while on vacation, only to return home not relaxed or rested!We should take time away from social media or other obligations and just enjoy the offline moments in our lives. If other’s can’t understand or appreciate that; we don’t need those people in our lives.Thank you my friend.

  6. I got asked a few days ago, "As a Networker focused on building relationships, how do you stay in touch with everyone?" My reply, I can’t. I pay attention to what is going on as much as possible, respond to every question, email, tweet, FB Post, LI message, etc, etc, when I can and do the best I can all the time. However, even the best I can, isn’t good enough for some. For these folks, I will never be good enough, thus I take them off my pay attention list.It’s called Life and I live it.

  7. John Lusher says:

    <html><head></head><body style="word-wrap: break-word; -webkit-nbsp-mode: space; -webkit-line-break: after-white-space; ">EXACTLY! &nbsp; You make excellent points, Teddy. &nbsp;We co all we can, but we will never please everyone. And, its okay to let some go; because our time and sanity is better spent elsewhere.<div><br></div><div>Thank you for your comments!!</div><div><br></div><div><br><div><div></div></div></div></body></html>

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