While we strive to do our best in life, relationships, work, and everything else; I am convinced that if we learned and accepted at an early age that we will screw up, we would be much happier. Now, none of us expect to be perfect of course, but we all have problems with making mistakes.

For example:

* We will completely ruin a good relationship or friendship.

*We will disappoint others.

*We will get fired or reprimanded in our jobs. Incidentally this could be a good thing for us!

*We will say the wrong thing at the wrong time.

*We will make complete fools of ourselves.

If we are LUCKY, we will do these things! Why lucky? They are learning experiences. The best learning experiences are from the mistakes we make as human beings. Hopefully we will learn from our mistakes and not make the same ones twice, but even if that happens we can learn a lesson.

I have learned SO much in my life; which means I have screwed up....a LOT! I am sure I will screw up more, but that's okay, I am human. It doesn't mean I don't try to not screw up, but I've learned to not worry so much about the mistakes. Life is too short; apologize if you can and if appropriate, learn from the mistake and move on.

Thoughts?

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For several years now, I have followed and consumed most of the writings of Chris Brogan. Working in marketing and social media, Chris is a wealth of information.  However, to me,  the nuggets of wisdom on life, work and other topics are just as valuable.

Each January Chris publishes via his blog his three words for the year.  Chris does this to encourage himself and others to use these words to focus on defining goals for the year instead of making New Years Resolutions. If your curious about his post for this year, check out My 3 Words for 2012.

I also read a story from a more spiritual perspective by Debbie Macomber, Choosing Words to Live By.  She choses one word per year to focus on for the entire year.  Her story is powerful and her words are ones that have helped her over the years.

I have chosen to do this in years past and it helps me focus on goals for the year, so I encourage you to give it a try.  Let me know how it goes for you!

Here are my 3 Focused Words for 2012:

Listening

We have all heard the phrase "we were given two ears and one mouth for a reason." Sometimes that is lost during the moment, especially with me. So my first focused word of the year is Listening. My committment to those around me is to spend more time listening and less time talking. Anyone that knows me knows I can talk; but doing so instead of listening is not the best use of time for myself or the other person.  Listening is paramount for me this year.

Friendship

My second focused word for this year is Friendship. I am blessed with an abundance of connnections, followers and friends online as well as offline.  However I have not always been the best friend I can be to those people. That is changing. Focusing on Friendship is vital to maintaining the friendship as well as just overall relationships. Luckily I have shinning expamples of how friendships should function. Friendships come first for me this year.

Challenging

My third Focused word for 2012 is Challenging. I am challenging myself with being a better Listener, with developing and valuing all Friendships. I will challenge myself to be the best friend, husband, brother, son and business owner I can be.  I will challenge myself to improve my health this year. 2010 was a good year for getting in shape for me, but ended with a triple play that sidelined me; bulging disc, rotar cuff injury and the need for a cortizone injection just to walk. Yes, I overdid it, but then I let that be an excuse for 2011.  No more. Challenging myself is key this year.

Those are my words; what about yours?  Do you focus on specific words for the year?

You can connect with me through the platform of your choice:  Facebook, Google+, LinkedIn or Twitter.

 

Recently during a cold and rainy Saturday afternoon while working, I turned the T.V. on for background noise.  Since I was tired of my music library, my thought process was that the T.V could provide something to tune out while I worked.  See mom, I still do that; it worked in high school and it works now! Well, for the most part; read on to see what I mean.

I believe most of us have confidence and faith in our own abilities.  We believe we can accomplish quite a bit on our own, and traditionally, we don't like to ask for help.  In life, as well as in the business world; we need to get past this outdated way of thinking and build an alliance. This alliance can and should consist of both online connections and offline, or real life connections.

More simply stated, we cannot do it alone.  It takes the help and support of others to reach our goals in business, in life, in everything we strive to accomplish.  I admit that I need help in certain areas and thankfully I am part incredible alliances that I have built over the years. My network is strong and it is growing each day; but make no mistake, it takes time, energy and effort to build and maintain these alliances.  How do you build an alliance?  Here are some simple steps:

Online

• Consistently Connect - the proliferation of social media profiles and platforms have made this easier than ever.  Whether your preference is Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn or others, you must consistently connect and provide valuable content for your alliance members.
• Promote Others - spend considerable time online promoting others in your alliance or network.  Open up your network to the people that you trust, respect and recommend.  We all have different alliances & networks and promoting others to your alliance is beneficial to all.
• Respect Your Alliance -  if your alliance doesn't want to promote someone you believe in, respect their wishes.  If they do not want to take part in a project you are involved with, it's okay. It just  may not be for them or their network; so respect your alliance and do not take advantage of them!

Offline

• Meet Regularly -  this can be accomplished by meeting for coffee, lunch or a business meeting at their place of business.  This will enable you to see their environment and what is important to them. For valuable members of your alliance, scheduled regular meetings;  do not leave this to chance!
• Make Connections - much like promoting others, you can work to make connections for your alliance members.  Who do they need to meet? What itch of theirs can you scratch by making introductions?
• Never Assume - just as your time is valuable, so is the time for your alliance members.  Never assume that they have time to just chat by stopping by their office.  Respect their time and what they do and never assume!

Notice how the tips are similar for both online and offline?  That's because they apply to any type of relationship, alliance or professional partnership.  In building an alliance of people that will help you, you must FIRST help them. If you approach building an alliance by seeing who you can help; you will have one of the strongest alliances possible. Those are my thoughts; what say you?